True Courage Coaching

Making big decisions

Liz — Mon, 26 Sep 2011 16:51:16 +0000

If you think about making big decisions in your life how does it make you feel? Excited? Scared? Eager to get started? Ready to hide?

This is one of a series of articles about decision making, all designed to help you through that big decision.

Think back to a time when you last made a big decision.
Were you looking forward to your future with anticipation? Or were you trying NOT to make the decision because it was overwhelming?

Big decisions are difficult because they can affect many aspects of your life. You may have less or more money. Making a big decision might lead to less security. Or while it may be exciting for you your loved ones will be challenged by it. Or maybe you have so much invested in your current life that change just seems so difficult and so you put off making a decision.

And the one thing that you may be unwilling to admit, even to yourself, is fear. Fear of decision making can keep you stuck, even when where you are is increasingly uncomfortable. It might be that you are afraid that making changes will lead to success, but will also take you away from everything that you know and are familiar with. Or perhaps you are making a decision about something that could result in failure.

While fear of failure is acknowledged as a barrier to good decision making, fear of success is often overlooked. Being afraid of being really excellent, really powerful and really making a difference is very common and is a huge barrier to overcoming decision making problems.

So if you are blocked around making a big decision, ask yourself honestly what it is you fear…and this can be the start of making the decision. As I coach people through major changes and transitions I know this matters, and I can help you manage that fear (and can even make it go away), so don’t hold back on the decisions you need to make.

The decision making process does not have to be difficult and decision making tools do not have to be complex.

And if you are stuck over making a big decision, get hold of my Decision Guide now!

Or contact Liz to find out how YOU can get coaching through YOUR big decision.

Best wishes for your future,
Liz

How to Make the Big Decisions – and Avoid Decision-Making Disaster

Liz — Mon, 27 Jun 2011 15:16:30 +0000

Big decisions, by their nature, are scary. Decision making is in inexact science and the biggest decisions are usually made with incomplete information. There’s always the potential to know more but you can’t predict what’s around the corner and you want to avoid that ‘if only I had known’ feeling in the future. And you may wonder if you are yet ready for change. Or you maybe deciding what will make you take the big step.

Added to this, it is often easier to sit on the fence, fob people off (or fob yourself off) with excuses. It’s easier to say ‘I’ll need more information’ or ‘I’m still thinking about it’. It’s easier to put off a big decision because you don’t have the mental or emotional energy to really think it through.

And when you do this the big decision, like the major task or project, just seems to get bigger. The choices seem more catastrophic and the comfort of staying where you are and doing nothing is what you want.

The problem with this approach is that when you know you have to make a big decision putting it off doesn’t help. The ‘big decision’ pain is still there, eating away at you. It’s like a burden you carry around. It colours your life and everything around you. Its taint acts as a negative energy for everything you do.

And that’s definitely not a good feeling!

There’s always the danger that when it gets too much you do make a decision, but it’s hasty, ill thought out and even dangerous. You are acting from overwhelm, not from strength.

So I want to give you some tips and guidelines to avoid decision-making disaster.

Think about it. Yes, there’s no getting away from it, decision making takes a bit of work. You don’t drift into it (unless you make a decision to drift) and it won’t happen by osmosis.

Think big and you’ll unfurl like a flower, you’ll be able to blossom. Then have a plan to express this big life you want to lead. Even if you don’t know all the answers you can still have a plan. And if you wait till you get all the answers before you draft the plan, then you’ll never make the decision!

Know what your options are:

You need to know the external options. What can you do? What is possible? What is out there? And try to think beyond your current horizons, this is your chance to truly expand your life and its possibilities
You also need to know your internal options – what do you want to do? What’s the long game?

Value yourself. Do what you have to do to get the best deal for yourself. Recognise what you are prepared to do to support yourself and life the life you want. This doesn’t mean walking all over other people or ignoring what they want. But you should value your own wants and desires as much as theirs. And be prepared to claim the value that you have, now, already. Know your best qualities and excellences – REVEL in who you are!

Look to the future and know that life is a journey. You don’t have to get it all right, it’s not a test. And as you look at the future, make sure it is your future, not someone else’s. And decide now what decisions you need to make to get there.

Making change can be easy!

To YOUR success!

About the author: Liz Copeland is the True Courage Coach. If you are on the brink of something big and want to move forward or if you are being forced to take a big step True Courage Coaching will support you. So if you’ve lost the job, your partner or your waistline and you want to get to step up and into your ideal future get started right away with your free True Courage Creation Kit at http://www.truecouragecoaching.com

Taking Big Steps and BIG Decisions — What Makes You Do It?

Liz — Thu, 02 Jun 2011 17:25:42 +0000

So today is the day that William and Catherine (or Wills and Kate, as the newspapers will have it) get hitched.

And deciding to get married is a big step in anyone’s life. But particularly for this couple who have the eyes of the world upon them. William is used to that and has been brought up to know he is in the public eye, but for Catherine it must have been a shock to realise how much of her life will be exposed to public gaze.

Furthermore, once married, Catherine’s status will change substantially and she will have to mind her Ps and Qs, always being aware of Royal protocol. She already seems to have a handle on this and has an admirably pragmatic and common-sense approach to what she can and cannot do.

And although she has spent many years getting to her wedding day, this preparation time may be ultimately the thing that will make this marriage a success. Catherine has had time to get to know her husband and his lifestyle, with all that is involved in that. She has grown up and had time to consider what she is getting into.

So although the step she is taking today is a huge one, she has spent many years preparing for this day.

And that’s what sometimes happens, you make a big change but you have, in fact, been preparing for it for a while. You’ve decided you are ready for change.
You’ve considered the pros and cons, you’ve looked at your future life and asked yourself realistic questions about it before you make your decision. You may be even changing your life in a time of crisis. So you’ll think about making changes carefully.

And you know what? In spite of all this preparation YOU STILL WILL NOT KNOW if the decision is the right one. Because often the biggest decisions of our lives are made with incomplete information. We simply cannot know (without a crystal ball) what the future holds and we cannot plan for all the uncertainties of life.

But that doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take a chance. Life is about living, not just playing safe. Life is about making the gutsy decisions, not just about existing. Life is about making choices that might make your mother a bit unsure (if you don’t rock your parents’ world just a tiny bit you are playing too safe).

So what gutsy decision are YOU going to make? What major life choice do YOU have in front of you? Go on, be brave, go wild and imagine. Then plan what you will do and when.

You only have one life, so make the most of it.

And William and Catherine? I wish them all the best for their future!

This Is YOUR Life – Seize The Moment To Make The Changes You Want!

Liz — Wed, 27 Apr 2011 16:05:39 +0000

I always ask the same question when my son comes home from school. After the hello and how are you the next question is ‘what homework have you got?’

And a couple of weeks ago I got an answer I didn’t expect – ‘We weren’t given any homework because we spent the day remembering my dead friend.’

One of my younger son’s classmates had collapsed and died over the weekend. This was totally unexpected. He was a lovely boy, on the school rugby team and a member of the school orchestra, a great contributor to the world. And only seventeen.

Events like that make you hug your loved ones a bit closer. And make you wonder how you would change your life in a time of crisis. And whether its personal events like the loss of a loved one or world events such as war and earthquakes, sometimes the world feels like a scary place. Or at least a very uncertain place.

So this week I want to give you encouragement and support in a changing world.

When you are in overwhelm, when you are suffering a personal loss or when you are feeling the pain of the outside world here is an exercise you can do to rebalance your energy.

1. Take yourself to a quiet place, the place you use to restore your inner energy. It might be a special part of your home or you might want to be in a natural environment such as a park or the countryside.

2. Breathe in and out slowly and deeply. Do this for three breaths.

3. Now feel everything you have to support you. Feel the chair or surface supporting you. Be aware of the breath you breathe as you breathe in and out. Be aware of the power of your lungs to support you. Be aware of all the body processes that support you.

4. Now expand your awareness to all the people who support you – family, friends, work colleagues, people you meet on a day to day basis – anyone from whom you have felt the energy of support. Be aware of this support extending back into your childhood and extending into your future. Even if you don’t know who those people will be in your future, you can have an awareness that they are there.

5. And now be aware of all your strengths and resources, all the qualities you have already inside you, that you can use to support yourself and others.

6. And as you are aware of the support of the physical universe, the support of your body, the support of others and the support of yourself, see all this as a unified whole. The universe is here to support you.

And now decide what changes you can make, so you stop playing safe, playing small, or sitting on the fence so you can create your life and share your wonderful, unique gifts with the universe.

Making Change Easy: Overcoming the blocks, hitches and glitches to change so you can create YOUR wonderful future RIGHT NOW!

Liz — Wed, 06 Apr 2011 15:30:09 +0000

Liz Copeland has discovered that the path to change doesn’t have to be difficult or scary or overwhelming, and she’s going to share ALL her secrets with you on this free call.

Even if you are going through really big changes. And creating growth and making the life you want is easily accomplished if you make just a few simple changes.

Many people aren’t happy because they feel stuck, they want to make what seems like quite simple changes, but they aren’t able to do it. Most people stay stuck because they think that the changes they want are impossible, or the success they want will be too difficult to achieve, or it won’t work for them.

But making the changes YOU want to get the success YOU deserve really is easy – join Liz for this 60-minute teleclass where she’ll be showing you how it’s done. The call is on the 19th April, a very special date in her calendar (she’ll be explaining why on the call).

On this call you’ll discover:

The secret of getting through MAJOR CHANGES like JOB LOSS or DIVORCE
Why repeating old patterns is SO easy, but you are not to blame
How to capture the power of change and use it to ENERGISE YOUR LIFE
When you can OVERCOME THE DESIRE TO PLAY SAFE without being reckless
The BIGGEST BLOCK TO CHANGE that most coaches don’t even talk about

Get all the details and reserve your spot here:
http://www.truecouragecoaching.com/teleclass_apr19.html

Crisis or Opportunity?

Liz — Fri, 18 Feb 2011 03:41:51 +0000

Planning in a time of crisis is always difficult. Planning in a time of rapid change is also challenging. People become more cautious, they want to make fewer decisions and they want to make safer decisions. Or … they want to make no decisions at all!

But change is also a chance to do something new. If you want this year to be different maybe change is just the leverage you need to start thinking about a new and different future. This could be a new job, a new partner, a career move, taking your business in a different direction or a complete change of lifestyle.

And this takes courage! Making the change takes courage, but even thinking about it beforehand, even imagining it also takes courage. This is really where the greatest change takes place, in your imagination before you take a single step towards your new future. And once you have the internal certainty and knowledge, once you have activated your inner wisdom, the outer practical steps of change seem do-able.

So if you are planning to make changes in your life, maybe a career change or a business breakthrough, I can give you a process that will give you a long term payoff that you can’t put a price on.

And if you are facing divorce or the break-up of a relationship, you shouldn’t have to face this alone (and you need more than a very good lawyer). I am here for you and can guide you through this process.

So for a limited time I am offering a 30-minute slot to you to help you use the power of change to reach your dream. This is a no-cost conversation that will change your life. To find out more and book your slot email me directly at liz@truecouragecoaching.com

Reach Your DREAM in 2011

Liz — Wed, 16 Feb 2011 21:41:44 +0000

How do you feel about 2011 so far? Has it met with your expectations? Is it working out the way you had hoped? Are you feeling safe and secure about the future or does it feel like a rocky road?

Maybe you are dealing with a lot of unknowns and you feel you just aren’t in a secure place. Or maybe you know exactly what you are dealing with…and you don’t like it.

However much you feel you can predict what this year will bring or plan the future, you really can’t predict everything. So this year the more flexible and resilient you can be, the happier you will be as you deal with everything that life can bring you. Developing this inner resilience comes from having an inner confidence and knowledge that you can cope, survive and thrive in a changing world.

So to get you started on this year and to help you polish up those good intentions you made at New Year it’s helpful to play the game of looking back at the past. (We’ll also look at the future, but that’s in another article!)

Looking back on the past year, think about all the things you did and what you accomplished. Some things you deliberately set out to do, perhaps other things just happened. Now take a look at the feelings that you have about these events. Think about the things that made you feel good in 2010. At the end of the year there must have been some things you were celebrating (even if it was just celebrating getting though the year!).

Really identify the feelings you have about the past year, all the positive feelings that you’d like to repeat or have more of. And look at what actions or activities in the past year contributed to those feelings.

Now, considering what you have done over the past year, what do you want to do more of this year? What do you want to repeat or have more of?

More positive conversations with your teenager?
More challenging but interesting assignments at work?
More clients (but only more of the ones you really click with)?
More and better vacations?
What activities or events from last year could contribute to you having a better 2011?

And now a challenge for you – how many of these activities or events have you done so far this year? Are they in your schedule? And if they are in the schedule is it a ‘definite’ or a ‘maybe’?

Maybe you have carried around things from your past that don’t contribute to your future – old habits, old thoughts, old alliances, old obligations. But now is an opportunity to make sure you bring the good stuff from your past with you and build it into your plans for this year.

The past is not the future, but it does influence it. So let’s make that influence a positive one, and actively build into your future all the stuff you want. I believe you get to create your future, but only if you are prepared and ready to take an active part in its creation!

And if you want to get a head start with a special half hour planning session for this year, email me directly, Liz@truecouragecoaching.com with Plan 2011 in the subject line. I’ll get back to you with details of how to ensure 2011 is a success for you!

Are you planning to change?

Liz — Thu, 03 Feb 2011 14:39:32 +0000

By now you will know whether you are implementing your plans for this year. Whatever happy and productive thoughts you had at the beginning of the year, there is no longer the excuse of winter revels or holidays to stop you putting them into action.

But often when we plan, the plans remain on paper or in our imagination and nothing gets done. Perhaps you plan in the same way that my dog does…

His day begins ‘Oh, breakfast, that’s great just what I wanted.’ Then it’s ‘Oh, play time, just what I wanted’ and so on. He doesn’t plan very far ahead and when a thought comes into his head he wants to action it straightaway. This is fine for actions such as ‘Eat dinner’, ‘Lie down and snore’ , ‘Chase cat.’ But for anything more sophisticated or anything that demands a long term approach this doesn’t work.

Now most people don’t consciously plan in this canine way and their long term plans might be quite elaborate. But on a day-to-day basis do you fall into the trap of chasing the next bright thing that comes across your path? If you are planning to make changes in your life, work the plan each day. It takes conscious effort, because change has to take you out of your groove, so consciously decide what to do each day.

And post your comments below to let me know how you’re working your plan (or not!) – share your triumphs, problems or surprises here…

The Best Tools for Success in Change

Liz — Mon, 18 Oct 2010 15:45:39 +0000

Whatever changes you want to make in your life you will find some aspects of change easy and some aspects of change difficult.

The easy bit is working out that you need to change. That increasing sense of frustration, that growing sense of unease or just a general awareness of unhappiness, all of these things will make you realise that you need to change something.

The difficult bit is actually taking the decision to change, making a choice that you are prepared to take action to get rid of that frustration, unease or unhappiness.

Of course sometimes you don’t have a choice. You’ve lost the job, or you’ve lost the client or you’ve lost your partner or husband or wife and, boy, does that feel bad! So there you are, in the midst of change and you don’t even want to be there! But willing or not you still have to go through a process of change to accommodate the things that have happened.

As my specialist area is change and transition coaching (and I have developed a process specifically designed to power you through the changes you want to/have to make) there are many, many things I could tell you about how to do change successfully.

But let’s focus on one thing that will make you feel better about the whole change process.

And it is …(drum roll please)…

* Be optimistic.

* Be optimistic in knowing that change IS possible.

* Be optimistic in knowing that the outcome can be good.

* Be optimistic in knowing that you have the strength to do this change.

Now I don’t expect you to behave as if you’ve taken some Pollyanna happy-pill. I’m British for goodness sake, we don’t do that kind of unbridled enthusiasm. I’m not expecting high-fives or dances around the room. Though, to be honest, if that kind of enthusiasm comes over you I’d say make the most of it.

But at the beginning or in the midst of the change process it can be difficult to find that bubbling-over enthusiasm, because you are focused on what is NOT possible or you are worried about what can go wrong. If you find yourself in this place, just allow yourself to be optimistic that there is a way, things will work out, you do know what to do and many things are possible.

You do have more strength than you know. You have gained more wisdom than you are aware of. You have more capabilities than have yet found expression in the world. Hold onto these thoughts and take them into your life. And my coach’s thoughts and support will be with you as you continue on your journey.

To your sunny and abundant future!

What is Your Dream of Success?

Liz — Tue, 12 Oct 2010 15:37:08 +0000

What does success mean to you?

If you are reading this, I assume you want to be successful in some way, shape or form. But maybe you feel constrained by all the things you’d have to do, all the plans you’d have to stick to, all the goals that are worthy but, let’s face it, a bit dull.

If you feel like this, it doesn’t mean that you need to bumble along in pleasing mediocrity (though you can do that too if you want, this world is about choice). You can be more successful than you are now, you can make better choices you can have more ways of achieving your dream. Even if that dream doesn’t fit in with the rest of the world’s idea of success.

There are two things I want to say to you here, and if you detect a finger-wagging tone, I apologise in advance. I don’t mean to lecture. It’s just that so often I see people not living up to their potential and getting frustrated by their lack of progress. And this happens because they are saying to themselves, there is a success model out there, but I don’t want to be a multimillionaire so it wouldn’t work for me. They are saying, there is success coaching out there, but I’m not sure how far I want to take things, maybe it’s only for the super ambitious. They are saying I know I could change but I don’t want to…yet.

And the two things I have to say to you are:

1. You get to choose your future. You can be as successful as you want and in any way you want. If your idea of success is living off the land, recycling everything and making your own shoes then go for it. If you want to be a millionaire, go for it. If your idea of success is running your own business and still having time to recognise family members, that’s fine too.

There does seem to be an idea prevalent in the success coaching field that every client wants to be super-successful, earn millions while they sleep and have the yacht/mansion/labradoodle. Coaches market their products and services on this basis. But that can be off-putting for many people who, while they know they could do more, don’t feel up to being a multi-millionaire, get seasick at the thought of a yacht, and really don’t know what they want to do. They have the frustration of feeling they are not quite ‘there’ yet but don’t know what ‘there’ means to them.

If you don’t know what successful means to you, it doesn’t mean that the success coaching is of no use to you. But you may have to spend some time finding a coach who will value the real you, who isn’t totally tied in to the millionaire success model and who will give you time and space to discover what your dreams are.

2. You CAN use all the success coaching that is out there, just adapt it for your needs. Your success goal might be building a business, getting more clients, having better relationships, developing more muscles and less fat… and so on.

It is likely that you already know a lot about the outer steps you need to take. For example, building a better body usually means better food and more exercise; you know that already. Building a business means getting out there and finding potential clients. You know what you have to do; the thing that’s holding you back is some internal block, something that may be fear or hesitation or a reluctance to change. And it is this internal stuff that the coaching can be really good at addressing. It is this that will move you forward.

So whatever your idea of success is, or even if you don’t know what success is but you don’t want to stay stuck, find a coach who will understand where you are now, help you develop a plan for where you want to be and show you how to get there.